Being a mom can be one of the loneliest jobs there is. Granted you have all those little ones to take care of but to truly feel connected takes a whole ‘nother level out of a woman. This past week was one of those weeks that I would have normally felt all alone in this world of motherhood, however I was more blessed last week by the ladies that I have come to call friends than I have ever been. Last week our little brother came down with a flu bug of sort. Whenever little brother gets sick he does it all the way, there is nothing half about his strides to perfecting the sickness. In one days time I had changed 26 diapers, cleaned my carpets twice and had done about six loads of laundry. Of course the week that little brother decided to get sick was the busiest work week for hubby… in two days time he worked 33 hours. Unreal – yes, that was my thought! I just threw a lot of number at you… 26 diapers, two carpet cleanings, six loads, and 33 hours.
By Tuesday afternoon I had hit my limit, the tears began as I was getting middle and little brother into the car to pick up big brother and little brother decided to fill his diaper oh, yeah and mess my carpet with projectile puke! I threw little brother in the shower, clothes and all, grabbed the sheets off the bed that were covered, grabbed the carpet cleaner out of the garage, cleaned the carpet, stripped little brother, and did it all in about fifteen minutes just in enough time to meet big brother in front of his class after school. On my way to pick up big brother a call of desperation was made to a dear friend to meet me at a local drug store so I could pick up a few needed items and not have to bring in the sickie and the other two. My dear friend sat in the parking lot with her two kids in her car and my three in mine and watched them all while I restocked supplies.
My call to my friend was a little bit of a pride shatterer for myself, but it was needed – I couldn’t do it all by myself, I needed those reinforcements! In calling out I opened myself up to my friend, and she met me and was so kind and generous. Oh the blessing of a good friend.
The week did not get any calmer. A trip to urgent care by myself with three little ones for three hours, was as I am sure you can imagine, oh so fun! Lots of work hours for the hubby. Big brothers wondering why life had to stop because little brother was sick left me exhausted and slightly irritated… like I wanted to be strapped to the house cleaning up messy diapers and puke!
Thursday was a MOPS morning and with a sickie I couldn’t attend which was a huge dampener… girl time is a treasured commodity here. I spent Thursday pouting that I had to miss MOPS. As I was getting the brothers down for nap time I hear a knock at the front door, “who could possibly be knocking on my door?” I ignored the knock thinking it must be a sales person. Then the door bell rang… I walk up the stairs to find another dear friend with a cup of Starbucks Carmel Apple Cider for me. She said that she missed seeing me at MOPS and wanted to let me know that she was thinking about me. Honest to goodness tears formed in my eyes!
The rest of the week I felt like I was able to face knowing that I have friends that have got my back. I have been truly blessed by the woman that God has put in my life for this season of motherhood!
Saturday evening another group of friends invited me over to their house for some girl time. We sat around sipping tea, eating treats and chatting. That evening I walked away with an overwhelming joy in my heart.
Four years ago when our family relocated to Colorado I felt as if I had lost everything that I knew and loved back in San Diego. I left behind my church of which I had grown up in, my job that I loved, my friends that had my back since I was very young, my family… everything! Now four years later I feel as if God has blessed me ten fold! Granted it took me stepping out and realizing that people are not going to knock on my door to be my friend, I had to search out friends, I had to be vulnerable, I had to be willing to try… and God knew that was a stretch for me and that is why I have been as blessed as I have!
When we moved out here I assumed that the wives of my husbands friends would be my friends, that we would connect. Although that didn’t really happen, they are all in a different stage of life, having older kids and all. After a month of being a full time stay at home mom in Colorado I starting searching out friends. I would scour Craigslist for mom meet ups. I would hang out in the library, go to the parks, I would strike up conversations with people at play spots… I found myself being out going, which was not a strong quality I thought I possessed. It is funny how desperation for connections can drive your personality to make some pretty drastic changes! Putting myself out there was never something that I did, I was the reserved person that would sit back and watch, but that I knew was not going to get me friends. Action was needed and I took the steps towards that. Looking back, oh how happy I am that I did!
Motherhood could be lonely but when you have a group of friends that you can call on to sit with your puking kid while you run into the store, or bring you a hot drink just because, then well – it is not so lonely after all!
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